Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Today should have been special


My baby's due date would have been today. There would have been a room that had a crib and full of toys. I would be nesting, getting prepared, and waiting anxiously for our baby to arrive. I probably would have complained about backaches and swollen feet. And while I look in the mirror at my non existent waist- RM would assure me that he's never seen a more beautiful pregnant woman... and I would have believed him.

None of that will happen today, instead I mourn for a baby that should be here.

It has been six months since I lost my baby. And when I think time has lessened my grief, July rolls around and I find myself getting sadder as my due date approaches. I did not think that today would be so hard, but it is.

I'm trying to think of something to celebrate about today and I can't think of any- not at the moment.

Tomorrow will be a better day, but today I grieve for a baby that should be here.


11 comments:

Kristina P. said...

I'm so sorry, my friend. My thoughts are will you.

septembermom said...

I wish I could be there with you right now. I'm so sorry. Hugs.

The Crazy Coxes said...

This just breaks my heart! I am so sorry!

Tara said...

So sorry! I am over from MMB. I lost my first baby as well. The baby's due date was around Christmas time. So I celebrate the baby each year by donating something to a child in need or a charity that benefits babies, preemies, or sick children. Nothing quite fills that hole, though. Hugs.

Sue said...

I grieve for that baby, too. It would have been a very fortunate one, indeed, to have been born into such a wonderful family. The baby touched you in a special way. Perhaps you can find some comfort in that. With love.....

wendy said...

I think sometimes, we just need to set some time away to grieve.
It is sad.
so-----after you have had your time to grieve, tomorrow will indeed be a better day.

Anonymous said...

WOW. I have never lost a child ( I don't have children ) but my heart grieves for you.

Anonymous said...

I would like to exchange links with your site hkweighin.blogspot.com
Is this possible?

Anonymous said...

Nice post and this post helped me alot in my college assignement. Thank you as your information.

InWeighOverMyHead said...

I am soooo sorry.

Unknown said...

I am praying for a miracle. Something to bring you joy.
Like that big party! XO